My encounter with Bohu last Friday left me empty, lonely, and hungry. After falling overboard I wondered if Bohu was real. Are there more like Bohu? I asked myself. I fast-forwarded past the memory, but I tired soon and stopped again. Saturday I took inventory and thought about the week’s adventures. I planned to rest yesterday.
I got up after the sun, read, and ate late. After all, it was Sunday. Isn’t that what Sunday is for? I stretched my legs out, propped my feet up, and drank my coffee down. The wind was gentle and warm water lapped at my boat’s side. I dozed off.
All was calm but my own mind. A whirlpool of what-if’s put me into spin cycle.
What if I …
– run out of provisions before I arrive?
– get sick?
– see Bohu again?
– meet new monsters from the deep?
– can’t rest?!
I was uneasy. I got up and paced back and forth the length of my small vessel. The radar was off, and I could not see anything on the horizon. The sky’s reflection on the waves hid any dark creatures that may have been lurking beneath. Why was I anxious?
I took inventory of my supplies. I had enough for the day, and maybe even the next. How much will I need? I asked myself. My last look at the charts estimated 17 months to get there. I did not have that much. I’d have to resupply along the way. But where? Can I afford the food, water, fuel, equipment, and ‘guess-what expenses’ along the way? I worried.
My day of rest had turned into a day of unrest. Taking a break stopped my boat but not my imagination. I looked for problems, and I found them.
A bright fluorescent flash of orange streaks beneath the ocean’s surface caught my eye and captivated my attention. They were fish like none I had seen. Now I had something I could see to worry me. I wanted to touch one to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. I leaned over the side of the boat for a closer look, and so did they.
They were beyond counting. They were fast. They were many. Unlike Bohu, these fish had big eyes and sharp teeth and they swarmed to examine me. That worried me. My day of rest became a day of swarming orange fears with sharp white teeth. I didn’t try to touch one.
I turned away but I could not unsee what I had seen beneath the surface. Bohu was bad, but I wondered are these new-to-me miniature monsters friends of Bohu’s? I didn’t ask and they didn’t say, but I believe they were anxiety piranhas.
I needed to eat something to calm my nerves and quiet my anxieties. I wanted a combination pizza with extra cheese, chips, dip, colored water with sugar, and ice cream. Food would make the anxiety vanish, at least for a moment. Could I call for delivery here? I thought. I itched for a food-fix, even if I had to scratch the guilt later.
Then Nurit called me to eat. She had prepared lunch for me. It was not the one I wanted, but it was the one I needed. I thank my God for Nurit!
I planned to rest yesterday, but like many plans I make, it did not turn out the way I expected. My anxieties crept up me. My Best Friend Forever said never to worry, and another who made this voyage before me said not to worry about anything, but pray about everything! I have a long way to go. The best way to avoid Bohu and the anxious orange piranhas is to read the instructions and follow them.